Snow day

I'm not really in the mood to be writing but I heard a poet talking about writing and how you should do it even when you don't feel like it and I don't know what else to be doing(i could be doing a lot). Even though this isn't really the type of writing i count as valuable, this is just journaling thoughts I'm still gonna do it.
When Automm calls all we talk about (well not all, really, but it always comes to mind) is that the group I am in has fallen apart. In fact I've had that conversation with so many people. We've all got such strong personalities.
Enough.

I dreamed last night that I was an immortal and for a few seconds I was flying. Sigh. And a hurricane came and it hurt me but I persevered because I was immortal and then I thought: "I'm stronger than a hurricane but weaker than a mouse." It was a good dream. I've been having so many good dreams I can only half remember and I know they are interesting because I see little flashes of them that are wonderful but I can only remember split seconds. I should work on that.

My mother took me out shopping yesterday for christmas gifts and I got a few things at Habitat because I don't want to support any other store. But then we went to Ruby Tuesdays and I ordered something. We sat in somewhat silence, and I think I'm beginning to blame myself for the lack of good conversations in my life, it hurts to. It helps to make it seem less terrible, being in control. (although time has proved that when in control I screw myself over. I feel ever responsible for keeping myself above water, and for losing my strength in the days that have past)